every blessing of devotion

the vision of you that i have glorified

shades the reality that our lines run parallel

i could write sonnets and words that flutter

fill my lifetime with the obsession of you

and you would never know

i mistake a moment’s glance as longing

and a graze of touch as adoration

when you’ve never so much as spoken to me

i’ve deluded myself for the sake of joy

or maybe for the thrill of heartache

because it’s just so addicting to love

all i want to do is pour my life into someone

give them the undivided attention i wish for myself

it provides comfort to my desire to be loved

if i could imagine you in my place

i may feel complete in my being

and i could let the guilt of loving you settle in my stomach

it’s not like you were the one, but you could’ve been

had you had insight into my mind or read the pages of my journal

things might have been different

but now i can see that i was looking for pieces of myself in you

i enjoyed the idolized version of you better because i grew so familiar,

trying to draw something out of nothing

someday, i hope to breathe love and happiness into someone else

so i can feel it for myself

but for now, its all for you

– tay naz